Being married to a narcissistic person is a situation that’s challenging at best. If you have children together when the marriage ends, you’re going to move into a new phase of life with a narcissist because you’re going to have to work through the child custody matters. Having to do this with a person who is narcissistic isn’t going to be easy.
One thing that almost never works when one parent is narcissistic is co-parenting. This is because there is too much communication and too many compromises when you co-parent. Open communication in a co-parenting relationship leaves a lot of room for the narcissistic person to try to control you. A narcissist isn’t able to compromise because they can’t see anyone’s views but their own.
You’re going to need clear boundaries when you’re setting up the parenting plan terms. These should be relayed in the parenting plan, but you may also need to set your own personal ones. Your ex is going to try to get to you. They want to play on your emotions to gain strength and to get control over the situation. For this reason, you can’t let them see when they’re getting to you. Try to keep your emotions to yourself when they’re around.
More than likely, you’re going to be in for a long battle with your ex. Keeping documentation of everything that happens, including communication, is beneficial. You may consider using a documented form of communication, such as parenting app, so that you can show exactly what was said or agreed upon if you have to do so in court.