Nothing is more important to you than your relationship with your child. Unfortunately, that relationship has been strained since you and their other parent separated. You knew divorce would be hard, but you didn’t think that it would have the impact that it has.

You know that your ex-partner isn’t saying anything bad about you, so the truth is just that your child isn’t settling in well with your current custody arrangements. They often cry, throw tantrums and want to be with the parent they aren’t with at the time. What can you do? How can you help them through this? The first thing to do is to look at your custody arrangements.

Take a careful look at your current custody arrangements

The first thing to do is to take a careful look at your custody arrangements and if they’re really going to work for your child. Young children, in particular, may struggle with long times away from each parent. For example, if you have a custody schedule where you switch custody every seven days but have a 4-year-old child, you may want to change your schedule to switch back and forth every two or three days. It’s important for your child to have access to both parents regularly at such a young age.

If your schedule is already set up with only short times away from each parent, then you may want to look into your child’s routine. Is it the same at each home? What can you do to make it more similar? You and the other parent will need to work together to find a solution.

Children will adjust, but if your child is struggling, take a step back and review the situation. Find what works and what doesn’t, so you can make things easier for them and yourself.